short...

I'm feeling pretty small today. Was doing okay at work, busier than you can shake a stick at, and more work piling up, but I was doing okay.

I got home, found out that Dan has gone over my transcripts (which I turned in a while ago after the dean of arts and letters at bsu told me to) to discover that I'm short.

One credit.

*sigh*

I always have brushed off my degree as I do most of the rest of the important things in life: who cares? I will have the same job, the same life, with or without the degree. Yeah, it'd be nice, but honestly.

When I found out that I could still get it, this little elated wee beastie stood up and roared, happily, for a few days. Dan helped me send in the plans. To find out that I didn't have enough credits, even after how many years of pushing this aside--I feel like those tomatoes you see on the floor at the grocery store, stepped on a few too many times but still retaining some kind of shape.

With the whole Jed thing going on too, I am having difficulty focusing. I need to get a thousand things done, and I just keep obsessing. At the same time I don't want to go over my transcripts myself, because I don't want to find that I only have 191 anyway, and I don't want to insult Dan by redoing his work. At the same time, it probably wouldn't be a bad idea, because two sets of eyeballs are better than one.

I'm just kind of crushed, in a very surprised type of way. I guess part of me thought, damn, I could actually *finish* something. Me, the procrastinator, could complete.

Like most things lately I'm reaching too far into the closet, and just a bit too short to actually get anything out.