i'm thinking about my plant, dorcas. i'm thinking about whether or not she ever has a day that makes her anything other than green and sun-seeking. does she long to bitch-slap the cat when shiva chews on a leaf or two? or flip me the bird when i walk by and forget to check to see if she needs water? maybe i'm being told to fuck off, right now, as i type.
it's hard to say, really.
this morning started off with a bang. all kinds of fubars that stemmed from things i did that got worse because i had no idea of what impact said things would have. like the domino effect, but without knowing that the dominoes were all lined up. it's kind of like one of those fractions i used to despise: bull + china shop = kim + computer system/taxes. i often forget that things don't work the way i think they ought to work. and then i wave my white flag and get the heck out of dodge.
i'm kind of at the hide point in a long game of hide and seek. the seeking...well, that can wait until next week. right now it's duck and cover, and hope to hell that the shrapnel is just stuff i can brush off.
think office space, plus landmines. theoretical landmines. but landmines all the same.
i'm not a bomb sniffing pooch. i've got enough training to make me dangerous. and after nearly 3 years at the same company, i often feel as new and green as my possibly pissy houseplant.
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