online cat dating: tips and hints

henry's been mopey lately, if a cat can be mopey. he and shiva were never the best of friends, but he keeps looking for her, watching the stairs as if she'll come down, and has become completely obsessed--to the point of self-mutilation--with the end of his tail.

dan and i have done everything we could think of to get him involved with toys and away from the tail, but it's been a losing battle. the other day i realized that a series of spots on the wall was actually blood spatter. it would have made "dexter" proud--little action dots and dashes that soaked in and will not come out without a coat of paint. i felt a little like i was covering up a crime scene when i broke out the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser--but even Mr. Clean cannot take on blood, i learned.

either way, i came to the conclusion that we needed another wee beast in the household. we considered a dog, but at this time of year, with my hours, it would be all on dan, and that did not seem fair to me. also i have to admit i was a bit nervous about him bonding with the theoretical dog whilst i crunched numbers at work.

so it came to a cat. that said, we wanted to adopt a cat around henry's age. he's not a small animal, and needs a companion who is roughly the same size. i looked on petfinder and saw a ton of eight-week-old kittens, and a variety of cats who were quite elderly, and a lot of special needs.

i know my limits.

instead i turned to craigslist.

i know, i know. there was that horrible incident in the good ol' state of mn itself involving a homicide and craigslist. i figured if i stuck to pets i would be safe.

for a few weeks now i've cruised the pet info. first i looked at dogs--but after deciding against a dog, i started surveying the feline choices. there were quite a few, but most of them were either the aforementioned kittens, or a pair of cats who "would prefer not to be separated."

on thursday i saw a post for an orange tabby. the picture reminded me of henry--orange spots on a white cat--and i thought, why not. emailed and today we are now proudly owned by a timid tabby whose name is skitters.

i'm not sure i can live with that moniker, but it remains to be seen what she'd like her name to be.

she's bigger than henry, but just as much a silly cat--terrified of the ceiling fan, even when it's not on.

she wants to meet henry quite badly; henry, for his part, is huddled under our bed, probably wondering why we're putting him through this hell.

either way, he's not chewing on his tail, and i'm hoping that, given his past interest in shiva, and skitters' current interest in him, he'll come around eventually and they will be able to keep one another company.

in whatever way cats do.

rock, meet hard place.

i hate this time of year. not for any of the usual reasons--the cloying muzak about christmas trees, the glittery tinsel that gives me a headache, the ubiquitous travel during a season meant for staying put.

no, i hate this time of year because of where i work.

this year, for some reason, i'm having a much harder time with it than i did last year. perhaps last year it was just the newness of being back in the same position where i started, or the fact that i was on different drugs, or age, or any thousand things.

when i lived up north my days were busy too--but not this sapping, please-god-be-merciful exhaustion that sets in after 10 hours spent trying to help Very Angry People without any support other than from my bra.

this year i have run into the proverbial wall. i'm tired but too stressed to sleep, i feel like i'm getting sick but cannot quite get truly sick, i want to curl up on the sofa and do Nothing, since my days are so full of Something that i cannot keep up.

there's a ton of snow outside for the first time in years, and i have not played in it once. i haven't gone hiking, haven't done anything. perhaps it scares me--if i go out and enjoy myself and recharge, all that recharge will just be squandered on getting up tomorrow morning and heading back to work. by tomorrow night i will be the same husk of a person that i am this morning.

i feel bland and uninteresting--and i know the only way to change that is via action. the mountain will not come to mohammed, etc.

i know these things--logically, i know them all the time--so why is it so difficult to make waves in my own life, when the ocean does so with ease?